Alright, alright. So there's apparently this dress swimming around the internet that has caused an uproar about what color it is. People are taking sides, and claiming that their faction is right. It's crazy insane that people care so much about one stupid dress, but I'm here to put that all to rest. Listen up, and listen well. When you up the contrast of black enough, you get the original color it was darkened from. But when you lower the contrast of actual, you get black again. Three pictures of the dress were compiled (by myself) with different variations in the contrast. The first was the white, the third was the black, and the middle is kind of a brownish grey. Apparently the dress is faded and really old, or just in the shade. Either way, we were presented with one picture by the tweet. Regardless of the color of the dress, the truth being that it was black and blue, the picture itself is white and gold, not the dress; this is because the picture had it's contrast upped to a great degree. You can tell because the images in the background are barely visible in the saturated light of the contrast increase. Sorry Whites and gold, but the dress is black and blue. But don't stop reading yet, the black and blues are wrong too. Like I said the original dress is black and blue, however the picture presented in the tweet was one of a white and gold dress, thanks to photoshop. Apparently some hipster discovered the sliders in the color options and decided to play with them, and realized black makes colors when you take away the black part. Who the fuck knew you could do that? Gee, I don't know, any preschooler? So the point is the dress is both white and gold and black and blue, one being the original and one being a really bad prank that got really out of hand. Those hipsters are probably laughing their asses off knowing we are basically giving our free will to them. But I also have another theor- WHO THE FUCK CARES. IT'S A FUCKING DRESS. GET OVER IT INTERNET. Why would you waste your life worrying about a stupid dress and what color it is? It's retarded honestly. Don't get so 'black and blue' over it, pun intended, it's really not relevant to your life. This is why I don't talk to people; they put the 'twit' in 'twitter'. Your welcome, you ungreatful mouth breathers, for solving your problem for you. I honestly feel that while everyone was fighting and I was busy not caring I had advanced intellectually at least a couple of days faster than anyone who actually cared.
No need to thank me, just your friendly neighborhood surgeon doing his job. Now go home and quit being asshats before I make you black and blue! Just kidding.
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